There are a few reasons. The first big one is that I'm just not feeling inspired by my wardrobe and the outfit combinations I have in front of me when I'm standing staring at the rails of clothes in the mornings. This comes and goes, and doesn't worry me very much.
The second reason is that I wear a uniform a lot now. Le sigh. A red Dri-fit polo shirt, three days a week. I wear this with any of a number of black Lorna Jane shorts/cargo pants/tracksuit pants (yes... I wear trackies to work) and sneakers, either black or white. Now do you understand why I don't snap many pics of myself in this gorgeous get-up?
Red = not my favourite.
The pants that were issued to me with my shirt were so hideous, that I think even classing them as golf shorts was flattering. Knee-length, multi-pocketed, high-waisted shorts are not going to work on even the most slender of bodies, and on my curves... NO. So I pull the ol' LJ Flashdance shorts and pants out of the wardrobe for work, and try to make an effort by putting my hair in a bun or a braid. Yep, that's the extent of my creativity. I would LOVE to tart up a polo shirt-shorts combo a bit more, but I'm stumped. If you've got suggestions, please let me know!
The third reason is that I worry about people judging me. Yup, I'm like everyone else out there, and way too concerned with other people's opinions.
'Hang on,' you say, 'isn't that why people post selfies and outfit photos on Instagram though? For others to look at and judge?'
Why no, my dear friends. No it's damn well not. I post outfit photos because I like seeing other outfit photos, and I feel inspired by style bloggers (completely separate from fashion bloggers, because who has the funds to keep up with fashion?) who wear a really cute striped tee with a denim vest over the top and I think 'Hey! I've got striped tees and denim vests, I'll try that. And maybe, just maybe, someone might look at my (probably coral and/or stripe tee) outfit and think 'That's cute, I might wear my stuff like that'. Or they might not, and that's ok too.
But I don't think it's ok for regular people to be judged on their everyday style choices. Celebrities who are famous for being celebrities, sure. I mean, I'll rag on Kim Kardashian's poor choice of ankle-strap stilettos until the sun comes up, but if a mum from Melbourne wants to wear those, good on her. Kim K (and pretty much anyone else in her clique) wear clothes TO GET REACTIONS from us, and from the media. Normal people wear clothes so their private parts don't show. Yes, double standards; but I never said things were fair.
All this to say that I had a brutal customer experience at work a month or so ago, and have only just noticed that it's affected how I get dressed in the morning, and how I share images of myself on social media. And I want to get myself out of that slump.
I bought these tights from work. I harboured no delusions that I would look like the above bum-model when I wore them, I just loved the print. It reminded me of a Finch swimsuit I had and loved as a 10 year old, and that made me happy. Lesson one: buy things that make you happy.
I was so excited about them that I wore said tights to work the day after I bought them (who doesn't do that? Nobody, that's who). I took a couple of pics in the fit room before work to send to my bestie (who is as much of a Lorna Jane print tight lover as me) and thought I might also share on Instagram later in the day. Lesson two: share outfit pics on Instagram shortly after you take them, don't overthink it.
Who matches their green smoothie jar to their workout tights? Lorna Jane girls do, that's who.
Before I got the chance to go sit in the sun on my lunchbreak, read excellent text compliments from my best friend on my new tights, and post a photo on Instagram, a customer walked instore and insulted me. Ok, so she didn't just come in and smack me in the face with cruel words, but she really hurt me. She wanted tights for exercise (you're in the right place, lady), the conversation was running along nicely, and after I explained the lengths of tights available, she told me what she wanted, so I pointed at mine, and confirmed 'You'd like a 7/8 style, like the ones I'm wearing?' (Retail 101. Always confirm what they want, because sometimes they explain very, very poorly.)
Her response almost floored me. 'No way, I don't want those. I don't think bigger girls like you should ever wear printed tights.' With a sneer. I smiled of course, and handed the customer over to a collegue. Then went and ate my body weight in avocado and fetta on Turkish bread because carbs.
Who even? I thought we clarified I was talking about the LENGTH OF THE TIGHTS, you muppet. Apparently not. And apparently you have rules on who should wear what. To which I say, leggings are pants. And print schmint. But that little exchange did upset me. I didn't post my photos on Instagram for a day or so, because I felt that I looked a lot bigger in them, and that I would get similar comments if I posted the photos. Lucky for me, my Instagram community are lovely. Lesson three: believe compliments, ignore criticism.
Lots of likes and love from my peeps on Instagram. Gems, all of you.
The first thing I did to drag my mind out of that 'Katy, you're horrible' place this weekend was read Melissa of Suger Coat It's new eBook '10 ways to be happy in your skin' and then I wrote her an email telling her that she was a genius. If you ever doubt your ability to shine in the body you have, this is exactly the book you should be reading. She's a delight. (Not sponsored, gifted or anything, it just resonated like crazy with me.) Lesson four: read wise words.
Get this awesomeness here
The second thing was to spend some time with people (pets are people too, for the kidless) who think I'm awesome just as I am. I mean, sure... my puppy would probably prefer that her mum was a super-runner who could take her for 5km jogs along the beach every day. And BB would just adore it if I had Christie Brinkley's bum. But I don't, and they love me so much. Lesson five: good husbands and dogs never lie, and always love.
The third thing is that I've consciously decided that I'll share more outfit photos. The good, the bad and the ugly.
Do you have any hot tips on feeling better about posting outfit photos? Have you ever had days, weeks, months, where you feel like you can't share?
And how would you have (politely) responded to a comment like the one I got at work?
Do you have any hot tips on feeling better about posting outfit photos? Have you ever had days, weeks, months, where you feel like you can't share?
And how would you have (politely) responded to a comment like the one I got at work?
Honey she was being a b***h, you are stunning and have legs to die for!!! I love you in those tights and any other outfit I've ever seen you in!! You are gorgeous and even more so because you are the coolest girl too!!! People are nasty because they are insecure themselves, trust me!!!! You are not big and even if you ever were who cares you are amazing, gorgeous and uber stylish xxx
ReplyDeleteSuch a great confidence champion in my life, thanks L x
DeleteLove this! Your attitude is admirable and I think everything you wear to LJ-work is FAB and it inspires me to put in a bit more effort in the mornings. Xx Annie.
ReplyDeleteBecause you look awful in LJ stuff. NOT! You big ol' spunk, you know I love you.
DeleteYou look gorgeous and in no way are you a "bigger" girl. The woman must have forgotten to take her chill pill. What a cow. Xx
ReplyDeleteHaha, the good old chill pill. I think I'll offer her one, the next tie I see her in Noosa!
DeleteFirstly, you're not 'bigger' anything, secondly, love the black and yellow on top, great outfit, thirdly awesome print lady...
ReplyDeleteAll excellent points, Emily. All excellent points.
DeleteYou are not a bigger girl Katy, you are just gorgeous. What a biatch. My thighs are bigger than yours (not that I'm comparing, haha!) but I wear leopard print workout leggings because I love them. So what?x
ReplyDeleteOh, now THOSE I think I need, Vicki! I bet you wear them REALLY well xox
DeleteA few things:
ReplyDelete1. I follow lots of style bloggers on instagram. I love most of what they wear, and sometimes I hate what they wear. I am very much of the "if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all" camp. I just STFU, or say "that would look lovely with......"
2. I recently had a sales assistant say to me "that dress looks lovely on ladies with fuller figures". I am a size 12-14. It mildly pissed me off, but it didn't get me down. I have spent far too much of my life hating how I look, and now I have decided "it is how it is", and just do my best and accept that there are some days where my mojo is lacking. A few years ago that kind of comment would've sent me into a tailspin, now it barely rates. The lady is a fecking cow, there are fecking cows in this world and you can't feckin stop them, the question is how would you react differently next time some feckin cow decides to be a feckin cow?
3. I have stopped asking people (including my fella) for their opinions on what I wear. If I don't feel awesome in it then I don't wear it. Nothing sexier than confidence, I say.
Great idea... love the old STFU, not enough people do it these days.
DeleteAnd thank you. Thank you for taking the time to visit, read and give me a big confidence boost. xox
I've had a fuller figure for years - even when I was a size 8, because I still had boobs. It doesn't necessarily mean it's a sledge. Although isn't it sad that we of it that way.
DeleteThat's freaking outrageous and a reflection on her not you. I miss seeing you in my IG feed and I'd love to see you again soon. You're a gorgeous girl inside and out. And you know it. x
ReplyDeleteOh Vanessa, since I have an enormous bloggy-crush on you and your amazing wardrobe of colour; what lovely words to read. Thanks so much.
DeleteWTF was that lady thinking!!! She either clearly could not see properly and needs to get her eyes checked, or is just a jerk. You look gorgeous as usual, and we definitely need more selfies of you - your smile is contagious and I love your style shots. Love this post by the way xx
ReplyDeleteMaybe I'll offer to drive her to SpecSavers next time I see her, eh Jas?
DeleteThank you so much for your kind words xox
I love the print leggings and the outfit you've put together in the photo. I think you're gorgeous and I've met you, so know it's not just good angles/photography etc. As a fellow #inbetweenie, I didn't think I could carry printed pants off myself, but through style photos of you and others, a month or so ago, I bought a pair, and have had nothing but compliments in them. You rock babe, keep it up. Big hugs, Rue xoxo
ReplyDeleteOh, hearing that it's not just a good angle is really one of the greatest compliments! Thanks so much, babe - and go you in your print tights!
DeleteI'm shocked, SHOCKED. WHO DOES THAT?! 'Bigger girls?' I tell you what Potaty, I'd like to have had some choice words for her but would probably have done the same. I love seeing you on Insta so more more more!
ReplyDeleteI think you look lovely, healthy and happy! I would far rather see clothes on real women like you and me. That customer is obviously not a very nice person so do t worry what she said. Reminds me of the pic I just put on IG - the mouth speaks what is in our heart x
ReplyDeleteYou look lovely in the tights! Keep on keeping on!
ReplyDeleteYou're a babe inside and out. And I'm lucky to call you my bestie.
ReplyDeleteMore Katy, more style shots, more of that big gorgeous smile x I would like to give you a big squish xx
ReplyDeleteI love seeing normal everyday people in outfits on Insta. That woman clearly has issues and needs to work on more than just her fitness. Your pants are cute and you look good in them, so eff the haters and post away!
ReplyDeleteYou're gorgeous, you're real, you're sporty, you're great. Poor her.
ReplyDeleteDon't let the opinion of a clearly bitter customer cramp your style girl, those tights are rad!!!!
ReplyDeleteI think you look awesome and you can wear whatever you damn well please!
ReplyDeleteI think you look fab! I'm crap at taking outfit photos myself. Don't have anyone to help and I'm in an outfit rut at the moment... I do take photos of bits of outfits...
ReplyDeleteSSG xxx